Received by a beech lane – report of a ‘walk of wisdom’
Our symbolic first pilgrim Manja Bente has completed her ‘walk of wisdom’ and wrote this report.
Received by a beech lane
Walking with what comes. My pilgrimage is just around the corner and I have registered in the Stevenkerk the day before in the logbook as pilgrim number 1. I’m curious what it’s like to walk the route now after having helped develop this tour on the organizational side. It will be my third pilgrimage experience, but this time on a route that I know and have walked for the most part. But I’m going on pilgrimage alone and that’s new.
My boyfriend makes a comment about whether I’m actually ready, but what is that actually being ready. Indeed, there are no stories of philosophers or any other book that could help me on the spiritual path in my half-packed bag, no diary in which I will write down my story every day. I have done that on previous trips, but I also experienced that walking unfolds by itself just like life unfolds to you. Also during a pilgrimage it is the days that follow and pass with all the moods that present themselves. Only during this trip you have the circumstances with you and I can pay attention to everything that passes by. That’s how I want to do it.
Because the church is still closed, I burn a candle of peace outside the Stevenskerk and a question arises: I ask for support so that I don’t worry about it on the way. However, the first worries soon arise. When walking I immediately get pain in my leg (I had a groin injury before I left) and yes it triggers a regiment of thoughts: you see, there it is again, I probably can’t walk the tour and is it good for my tendon that I walk now? I’m getting older too and imagine that I’ll never be able to walk such long distances again. The grinding system was already doing its job well and I wasn’t even at Bison Bay yet.
Fortunately, I was able to complete the entire pilgrimage just fine and what was special was that after the first day I also had fewer and fewer small worries. For example, I no longer bothered about the sleeping places that I didn’t book in advance and that only appeared in the evening when I got to the place where I wanted to sleep and the great thing was that it presented itself automatically.
From what Désanne van Brederode told so beautifully in the story about out of the box , some things were recognizable and I thought about them regularly during my pilgrimage. I, too, have suffered; Exhausted but still “had” to walk, I was thirsty and no more water on the Mookerheide, even though it was 31 degrees. Lying awake from the cold in my tent with my coat on. At such moments, being in the “now” is not at all attractive or easy to do and the resistance regularly played its ugly head.
Maybe that’s why the other experiences are so beautiful and pure and I was moved, for example, by a stately old beech avenue that was suddenly there and through which I walked as if you were welcomed and the beeches were ready for you. The enchanting little beech lane as in a fairy tale that enveloped you. The drops of dew on the blades of grass that splashed away when I walked through the grass. Glad to see the chapel again and to burn a candle and shelter from the rain. It’s nice to see all the fabrics hanging on the tree and to feel connected to all the creatures that share their suffering there. That it doesn’t matter what my hair looks like and my T-shirt stinks and I just put it back on. My backpack that was getting lighter and lighter and my mat in the tent that seemed more and more comfortable. I have seen my courage, but also my bias, my perseverance and I have experienced that it actually takes very little to be on a journey on the inside and outside.
It was beautiful on the trails and you could feel that they were not just chosen but woven together with love. Also the variety is so beautiful. First the forests and then the wide view of the floodplains. Near the Maas and Waal rivers. Even if it’s only a week, it really felt like a pilgrimage, along with all my bird rings that are pieces of my experiences. I was welcomed in the Stevenskerk by people who are dear to me. That was nice coming home. After that there is normal life again, internet, e-mails but a little different.
Carol.
Photo: Bart Kouwenberg
Out of the box: Désanne van Brederode during the opening of the Walk of Wisdom on 21 June 2015
